God, hold us to that which drew us first,
when the cross was the attraction, and we wanted nothing else. ~ Amy Carmichael


Thursday, May 14, 2009

Brown Boxes

Brown boxes. Packing tape. Empty, white walls. This is what my life is. A little over six months and it’s time to move on again. As I place my favorite books and photographs in boxes, I can’t help but feel it’s more than just objects I’m packing away. Recently certain dreams of my heart seem dead. But maybe they are just dormant for now. Maybe I’ll just put them in a box, tape it shut, and shove it in a storage unit. To be opened at a later date, unbeknownst to me. I’ll forget about the things in the boxes. I’ll forget what it was to live each day with them and feel that I couldn’t live without them. The dreams will fade away into the distant past of the way my life once was.

And then one day I will have a place to call home again. I will unpack the boxes. I will smell each book and cry or laugh as I remember the first time I read it. By the fireplace in my childhood home, with my legs tucked under me, listening to the rain on the windows. I will unpack the dreams and rejoice at the new ones that have replaced them. Or cry at how my heart still longs for that dream to be fulfilled. I don’t know what the new dreams will be, but I know that His mercies are new every morning. I know that there is the promise of a new dream in my heart. I know that a day will come when I will no longer have to pack these things away but I will be Home. But until that day comes...

1 comment:

amy. said...

Speaking of boxes... If you want to leave your stuff in the garage while you are gone, that would be fine with Brook and I. And also, if you want to leave your bed in the room, we're cool with that too. If you don't mind us letting random people sleeping on it. Obviously you can have it back when you come back to the Valley. This way you won't have to worry about getting a storage unit.

Are you even going to read this? :)